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Post by Fulong|Clara on Aug 19, 2009 22:35:23 GMT -5
Onji eyed the massive van with an eye that was not precisely disdainful but was most definitely dubious. "You got here in that?"
"Hey. The wheels still turn, and the air conditioning still works." An-qi leaned against the driver's-side door. "And this is our only means of getting anywhere outside this sad excuse for a town, so shush."
"We could always hitchhike." Onji poked An-qi. "And get off the door, I wanna drive."
An-qi twitched but didn't move. "No. The last time you drove, you fell asleep at the wheel."
"Only for a few seconds." The poking didn't stop. "And we didn't die or anything. I don't see what the big deal is."
"That's because I grabbed the wheel before we could run headlong into that pickup!" She swatted at Onji's hand.
"Semantics." Onji sighed in an entirely unnecessarily dramatic manner and trudged around to the other side of the van. "I call shotgun."
"My car." An-qi settled in the driver's seat. "And you're taller than I, so you would've messed up the mirrors and stuff."
Onji waved a dismissive hand as she unzipped the duffel bag in her lap and rifled through its contents. "Sixteen cans of Pringles, twelve bags of Sun Chips, thirty-nine bottles of conformity water, and a stale baguette. Are we missing anything?"
"Yes. Bian Ly."
"Oh, right," mumbled Onji through a mouthful of Pringles. "That would be important. And did you MapQuest the directions to whatever the hell the next town with an animal shelter is? How far away is it anyway?"
"Yeah. I don't even remember what it's called. About a three-hour drive. And give me one of those."
"Mmnngggffff," said Onji distinctly, and clutched the duffel bag to herself.
"We're not going anywhere until I get a Pringle." An-qi held out a hand. Onji thought for a moment before carefully placing the safety seal in An-qi's outstretched hand, followed by half a Pringle.
Popping the half-Pringle into her mouth, An-qi balled up the safety seal and lobbed it at Onji's glasses. "Ai-yah, why are you so stingy?"
"Aiiyaaaaah, because am Asian! I give you Pringle, now you drive! Go on! Drive! Except drive carefully, and maintain your distance, and do not go over forty miles an hour." A pause. "Aiyaaaaaah."
"Ai-yah, you are not my mother. And we're in the middle of nowhere. I bet you we won't pass more than three cars on the way."
"Such disrespect for your elders." Onji flung out a dramatic hand, just barely managing to catch the flying Pringles in time. "Drive on!"
[Yes. So. We're coming to pick you up, Bian Ly. That is all.]
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Post by DesperateDark on Aug 20, 2009 14:10:13 GMT -5
Where the hell was An-Qi and her barely functioning lump of a truck? On-Ji better have not driven them into the lake or something, she had a tenancy to fall asleep at the wheel. And if they had forgotten about her, oh, somebody was gonna get their apartment egged from the inside out. Or she'd hold an indoor paintball party at their place.
They were looking for dogs. Yes, that was what they were doing; going to the next town that had an animal shelter to look for some dogs. Why they wanted dogs? It was probably just a whim thing, but oh well.
"Oh, finally," the truck was coming into view just at the end of the road. Bian Ly leaned out and waved at them.
They were coming...
And coming...
Coming...
...Going
And going...
"Hey! Guys!" Bian Ly took off after the hunk of metal that An-Qi called a van. They had, of course, rolled right past her and kept going down the road. About two kilometres and a lot of screaming later, the vehicle screeched to a halt and the Vietnamese girl ran right into the bumper before falling to her back.
"Guys, must you do this every time you pick me up!?" She didn't bother to brush her pants off until she was safely in the backseat of the van and no longer in danger of having them drive off without her. "Where are we going and how long will it be 'till we get there?"
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Post by Fulong|Clara on Aug 20, 2009 15:21:29 GMT -5
"Yes, we most certainly do," announced Onji from her seat, popping a Pringle at Bian Ly. "Got to keep you in shape. One of us has got to be capable of running a few meters without falling over, and it sure as hell isn't gonna be me."
She leaned her seat back, propping her now-bare feet up on the airbag compartment and rolling down her window. "Next town over with an animal shelter is about three hours' drive from here. There's no way we can afford an actual breeder with our kind of paycheck, and I'd prefer to adopt anyway, yeah?"
Silence for a moment, broken only by the sound of crunching, before she poked her head round the seat again. "Hey, you want a conformity water?"
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Post by Aras|Ofelia on Aug 20, 2009 16:00:59 GMT -5
An-qi flashed a cheeky grin at Bian Ly before she went back to driving. "'Course we do. It's our job, you know? Except we don't do it for money, just for kicks and giggles. You're our unofficial younger sibling." From whom they got alcohol. But still.
"Don't ask me what the town is called. The only reason we're going there is because this excuse for a town hasn't even got an excuse for an animal shelter. Which, admittedly, sort of makes sense, 'cos you don't want to find out that the Newfie you just adopted is actually your next-door-neighbor's cousin, or something.
"Oi, why do you offer her food and not me? I'm the one who's actually driving here," An-qi groused, eyes flicking over to give On-ji a sullen glare before returning to the road.
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Post by DesperateDark on Aug 20, 2009 16:39:14 GMT -5
"Pffft," Bian Ly huffed and crossed her arms stubbornly, leaning back in the back seat. "Can you at least stop making me run into the back of the van every time? I swear, if I ever break my nose doing that, you've gotta pay for the surgery."
A few seconds pause as she ruffled through her own bag to find those papers she had printed out on dog breeds they might be interested in. They were taking a three hour long road trip to the next town to get two dogs, if she was correct. "And what? Conformity water? Is that some crazy Japanese drink? You know that Japan's been producing 85 percent of the world's weird shit since, like, 1952 or something."
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Post by Fulong|Clara on Aug 20, 2009 16:56:18 GMT -5
"Surgery? Fat chance. More like a Band-Aid and an icepack with our budget. It'll build character." Onji appeared to give the matter some thought before she brightened. "I know, we'll tie a pillow to the back of the van next time. Although maybe you might not build as much character then. Building character is very important. What say you, An-qi?"
She dug in her bag and came up with a clear bottle filled with an unidentifiable colored liquid labeled "vitaminwater" on the side. "No, man, conformity water. You have no clue what the hell it does, but you drink it anyway 'cos all the cool kids do. I bought these in bulk for cheap off some guy who clearly had no idea how much cool he was missing out on. Want a bottle?"
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Post by Aras|Ofelia on Aug 20, 2009 17:05:50 GMT -5
"Mm-hm. Character is... I dunno, a shield against all the stupidity we seem to have encountered lately. You don't want to be like that, do you, Bian Ly?" An-qi took her hand off the steering wheel momentarily to wag a finger at the woman in the back seat. "Now give me a Pringle, Rena."
A quick glance in the rear-view mirror. Bian Ly had drawn forth a sheaf of papers from her bag and was perusing them thoughtfully. "Wotcha got there?"
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Post by DesperateDark on Aug 20, 2009 19:29:29 GMT -5
"Yeah yeah, build character, right." Bian Ly continued to ruffle through the papers. "Tell me that again when my face's bashed in. And no way I wanna be like that Angelique person. Next time, just stick an airbag onto the back and watch me go flying as my face deploys it."
She took the bottle of 'conformity water' from On-Ji and popped the top off. "Sure, but it better not leave an aftertaste.
"And these papers are some info on breeds of dogs you guys might want. For instance..." She waved a clipping of maybe three papers at them. "If you want one that's perpetually high, then Boston Terrier or Boston mix. A really calm one, then get a pet rock... Or a Cavelier King Charles Spaniel."
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Post by Fulong|Clara on Aug 20, 2009 20:26:19 GMT -5
"Now, now," chided Onji, "did we mention Angelique? Do I have to be the one reminding everyone to respect their Elders again? The airbag is an excellent idea, by the way; it's a pity we can't afford one."
She crunched another Pringle and finally passed An-qi the can as she craned her neck to look at the papers. "I've been thinking German Shepherd myself. I'd train it to only respond to commands given in German. How awesome would that be, yeah? We could take him with us on missions and everything, and he wouldn't stop unless I told him to."
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Post by Aras|Ofelia on Aug 20, 2009 22:17:56 GMT -5
"That, Rena," An-qi said slowly, "is so bad that it isn't even a pun." With practiced ease, she reached into the proffered Pringles can without even looking, fishing out a thin stack of chips. She drove with one hand and tossed chips into her mouth with the other.
"German Shepherd seconded. Training it in German denied. How are we supposed to know if you told it to roll over so you can scratch its belly, or if you told it Bian Ly and I were its next meal? I say train it in Chinese." A pause. "And, uh, Bian Ly can learn. Also, has anyone thought of names?"
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Post by DesperateDark on Aug 20, 2009 22:43:52 GMT -5
"German Shepard, yes. In German, no. Chinese, meh, but I'd personally go for Vietnamese since it's the dominant uber double-throaty language." More rifling through the stack of papers until Bian Ly found a small stack of them. "German Shepard," she read. "Prone to some hip and elbow displasia, active working dog, shedders."
"As for names, it depends on what we actually get. No guarantee there're Sheppard's over there, since they tend to adopt out plenty quick." A pause as she took a sip of the coloured water and stole some chips from the tube of Pringles in On-Ji's hand. "I'd say something German and obnoxious so nobody can pronounce it or dare say it but us."
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Post by Fulong|Clara on Aug 20, 2009 23:35:09 GMT -5
Onji grinned, raising an eyebrow. "Viel Glück with that, guys. Our Shepherd's going to learn his mother tongue eventually. It's only proper."
She watched the road roll past them from between her toes, sinking deeper into the worn plush of the seat. "I'd be just as happy with a mutt, to be honest. They aren't as prone to disease anyway, and God knows we can't afford the vet bill if our dog did take ill. But if by some stroke of fate there is a German Shepherd waiting for us, we ort to name him Schadenfreude."
A pause. "We'd better hope she's a girl, then, 'cos that's a feminine noun and it'd probably cause some confusion on his part otherwise."
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Post by Aras|Ofelia on Aug 21, 2009 0:09:16 GMT -5
An-qi stuck the last Pringle into her mouth. "Huh. Stop rubbing in the fact that I took Spanish in high school rather than German," she said around a mouthful of chip. "I didn't know any better."
She stared at the road a bit absentmindedly. Fortunately, there wasn't a single car in sight besides theirs, so An-qi excused herself for letting her mind wander a bit. "Schadenfreude's a good name, whether Shepherd or mutt, girl or boy. Let's hope it doesn't just sit there and pant happily and wag its tail if we happen to fall down a well. Needs a nickname, though. I don't want to be trying to arrange those syllables in my head if I want to sic him or her on someone."
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Post by DesperateDark on Aug 21, 2009 9:22:55 GMT -5
“I, for one, don’t understand a thing outside of English, French and Vietnamese. That’s what I get for going to an art school, I bet.” In her head, she was thinking that she might as well teach the dog Vietnamese in secret, like on their walks or something.
“But yes, I like Schadenfreud; hard to pronounce, can confuse people and cause migraines. And even if it’s a he, the dog doesn’t need to know what a feminine noun is and what’s not, as long as you don’t tell him.” A few more chips popped into her mouth and crunched on a bit noisily. “As far as nicknames go, I don’t know any shortenings in German, that’s On-Ji’s job.”
Bian Ly leaned over the front seat to get a good view of the road ahead of them. “How much longer till we get there? I have little faith in Asian people’s sense of direction, you know.”
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Post by Fulong|Clara on Aug 21, 2009 15:38:29 GMT -5
"Schadenfreude is not hard to pronounce," said Onji crossly. "French is what's hard to pronounce, all those letters you don't even say in an attempt to sound cool. What did all those poor, innocent letters do to you anyway? Must you abuse them so?"
She was quiet for about another mile, twisting open another bottle of vitamin water and chugging half of it in one go. "We could call him Freud for short, as long as he doesn't try to psychoanalyze us. And it's only been, what, ten minutes? We've still got a ways to go, and if you don't have faith in our sense of direction, try and have faith in MapQuest, yeah?"
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